By Emeka Blast 
Sex and Happiness: Finding Your Ideal Frequency
Great question—this is one a lot of people wonder about.
The short answer:
Quality matters more than frequency, but research suggests that once a week is a “sweet spot” for most people in long-term relationships when it comes to correlating sex with happiness.
Here’s what science says:
- A 2015 study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science found that couples who had sex once a week reported the highest levels of happiness. More frequent sex didn’t significantly increase happiness beyond that point.
- Interestingly, the same study found that people often believe more sex equals more happiness, but in practice, that’s not always true—especially if it starts to feel like an obligation or performance goal.
- Another study published in Archives of Sexual Behavior in 2017 also emphasized that the perception of a satisfying sex life matters more than how often you’re actually having sex.
Key factors beyond frequency:
- Mutual desire: Are both partners equally into it, or does one feel pressured?
- Emotional connection: Sex that’s emotionally fulfilling tends to lead to more happiness.
- Communication: Talking about preferences, needs, and boundaries improves both sexual satisfaction and relationship quality.
If you’re single:
Sexual frequency and happiness are less tightly linked. For singles, self-acceptance, meaningful relationships, and autonomy tend to play a bigger role in overall happiness than sexual activity itself.
TL;DR:
- Once a week is a good baseline for most couples.
- More isn’t always better, especially if it feels forced.
- Emotional and relational quality of sex is more important than hitting a target number.
Let me know if you want advice tailored to your situation—relationship length, age, etc., can all influence what’s ideal.
